Comment on European & Indian meeting etiquette

I received this letter from a reader and, upon reflection, have run across several instances where the theories presented in my article are contradicted. . . Would like to hear from other people with international experience.

-Paula

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Hello Paula,

Thank you for the interesting and informative article located at: http://www.ravenwerks.com/global/europe.htm

One particular part I found interesting and opposite of a situation that happened this morning during a meeting. The situation made me uncomfortable and drove my desire to research international meeting etiquette.

The situation:

We are in a weekly managers meeting - video conference - between the US and Belgium. There are 4 managers (all of the same professional level) with me as the facilitator / minute taker. Our boss, who is a Director, was not present but wants the meetings to proceed without him if there are agenda items.

The boiling point:

One manager (originally from India, been in the US about 10 years) had hard feelings about a US manager’s management style. He had many pent up issues that seemed to burst from him. This put everyone on edge and it was very uncomfortable. The US manager apologized and tried to be courteous and diplomatic in taking accountability for communication heartburn. The Indian person kept going and it became very personal until the US person was on the defensive and couldn’t be civil. Others in the meeting were uncomfortable.

Article vs. today:

Under the section titled “Differences of Opinion” it is mentioned that US employees are more likely to have open arguments and air their feelings as opposed to Europeans who prefer being more discreet. In my business I find the opposite to be true in this case. The European and Indian both were in favor of “getting their feelings off their chest” while the US participants preferred to address this 1-2-1 amongst the two people in disagreement. If 2 people have an issue that doesn’t pertain to the whole group they should deal with it like adults.

I often find my European counterparts passionate about their work beliefs and they will often express their feelings of frustration opening among the group while the Americans sit calmly and wait for the end of their display of frustration.

That’s not to say Americans in my group do not show emotions or are not passionate about their working beliefs as well, but it seems less frequent, shorter bursts, and then it’s life as usual.

Sorry to babble, I just thought it was very interesting to realize that the observation I made during the meeting (and realized is often the case) varied vastly to the article in this aspect.

The article was spot-on for so many other aspects that I can relate to though. Particularly US employees multi-tasking during meetings and getting through topics as quickly as possible.

Thank you for the article and hearing my feedback,

D